Homer J. Simpson

Homer Simpson or simply Homer, as people close to him calls him, full name is Home Jay Simpson. Some of his vitals:

Height: 6 feet
Weight: It depends on the episode. Homer has weighed between 239 pounds and 300 pounds. Too many pork chops and donuts!
Age/Birthdate: This, again, depends on the episode. Could be 17-23-56, 05-12-56 or 05-10-55
Social Security Number: 568-47-0008
Blood Type: B positive
Earmuff size: XL

He lives at 742 (or 59, 94, 743, and 1094) Evergreen Terrace, Springfield, USA.

He has had many lifelong dreams. Some of them include Monorail conductor, run out on a baseball field during a game, manage a beautiful country singer, eat the world's biggest hoagie, be a blackjack dealer, appear on "The Gong Show", to own the Dallas Cowboys, to live in the woods and bowling a perfect game.

He has also won several awards, including the 1st Annual Montgomery Burns Award For Outstanding Achievement In The Field Of Excellence, Grammy for "outstanding soul, spoken word, or barbershop album of the year with the B-Sharps and a medal for "making what could have been a Chernobyl into Three Mile Island." Below are his Wawards and Honours listed in more detail:

• C. Montgomery Burns Award for Outstanding Achievement in the Field Of Excellence (after sterilization)
• Springfield Nuclear Power Plant Toxic Waste Handler of the Month (October 1990)
• Employee of the Month (after saving Springfield from a nuclear meltdown)
• Springfield Nuclear Power Plant Belching Contest Winner
• Grammy Award for Outstanding Soul, Spoken Word, or Barbershop Album of the Year (Be Sharps)
• Academy Award for Best Supporting Actor, (Dr. Haing S. Ngor or Don Ameche)
• Springfield Bowling Championship, 1996
• High school reunion awards: "most weight gained," "most hair lost," "most improved odor," and for "travelling the least distance to get to the reunion."

Homer is also full of nuggets of wisdom. Following are some of my favorite words of advice he has given.

• "Marge, it takes two to lie. One to lie and one to listen."
• "If something's hard to do then it's not worth doing."
• "Kids, you tried your best, and you failed miserably. The lesson is, never try."

He also waxes philosophical about beer.

• "Beer. Now there's a temporary solution."
• "To alcohol, the cause of, and solution to, all of life's problems."
• "Homer no function beer well without."

About his mid-life crisis:


Finally, here are a few of my favorite Homer Simpson prayers.

• "Lord help me, I'm just not that bright."
• "Dear God, give a bald guy a break."
• "As God as my witness, I'll always be hungry again!"

Source: What do you need to know about∞
See also: Homer Simpson∞

CategoryCharacters